Three smart messaging strategies to stand out in her inbox, even if she has a blank dating app bio.
What to do when her profile has no bio?
It can be very annoying when you see a woman online you like, and she has no bio! It gives you nothing to work with and can make thinking of what would be a great first message to send her tricky.
Whilst you might be slaving over creative, and original messages; it can feel frustrating to feel like she’s making no effort, and hasn’t even completed her bio. This is why I want to tell you about three strategies on how you can creatively message women online, who have no bio on the online dating profiles (and also help you get into the right mindset where you might want to pass these low-effort online daters by anyway...)
I’m dating coach Hayley Quinn and in this blog I share:
- 4 Strategies to message a woman with no bio, and
- 4 Common Mistakes guys make when messaging a woman who has no bio on Tinder
1. Prompt her to reveal some information about herself
My first strategy is to prompt her to invest in the conversation with you and tell you something about herself. In the first part of this, you want to do something to acknowledge the fact that she hasn't written a profile. This could be a little comment:
“Mysterious profile…”
Comments like this are showing that you've noticed her lack of profile which is good. Women love to be pursued for who they uniquely are, not just because you’re physically attracted to her. By quizzically pointing out that she has a blank Tinder profile you sub communicate, that’s an amber flag for you. Provided you communicate with her in a way that's playful and isn't critical, (as you should do with all your online dating messages) this indicates to her that you’re not just on Tinder, or Hinge, chasing any woman you “meet” for a date. You have standards for the women you date, and this makes you more attractive to her.
Follow this up with a question that prompts her to share some information with you. You could ask her:
"What's one thing I would never have guessed about you from your profile?".
By phrasing the question this way, it sets up a fun and playful challenge. She will have to come up with something creative or interesting that she's doing to share with you. Again this subtly communicates that it’s not an instant “yes” from you, and you’re focused on getting to know her.
Don’t worry that by subtly challenging her that you’ll get less dates (you won’t) instead she will be more attracted to a man who shows he’s looking out for more than just good looks in a woman.
If she does reply to your message by sharing some fun information about her life with you, that's a really good sign. If she writes back either "no", or "can't think of anything right now", you want to end the conversation there. If she does respond in a way that is open and playful though, she is sending you a good sign for continuing the conversation.
🔥 HOT TIP: you must get the phrasing right. If you say, “Tell me something about yourself,” it can sound a little bit like a psychotherapist. So make sure that when you ask questions it is playful, and cannot be interpreted in another way.
2. A riskier version of the first message. High risk = high reward.
So the second strategy is a riskier, and also more exciting, version of the first strategy.
We have a saying in the world of dating coaches, and that is: "risk equals reward". If you’re constantly missing out on generating the spark in your interactions, chances are you’re not being bold or authentic enough in your communication. her. Of course when you match with an attractive woman on Hinge, Bumble or Tinder, you may want to keep that match alive: But play it too safe, be too vanilla and you’ll never stand out.
By ‘taking a risk’ I don’t mean write a message that is sexual or crass in tone, this is never appreciated. However, playful teasing, candid comments, and having your own opinions are attractive qualities!
In this instance, you want to start by acknowledging the fact that she hasn't written anything in her profile. Say that phrase again, "Mysterious profile…". Then you can add:
"Does this mean I get to make things up about you? ;-)"
“Huh, no bio. So I’m going to have to guess who you are, what you do and what you’re like?”
A higher risk message like this carries more chance of it spectacularly bombing, she could quickly shut you down with a “No.” However, for the kind of women you want to meet who are playful, open and flirtatious then it can create a fun game in the conversation, she could reply, “only if I can make stuff up about you too.”
Also when you use the word YOU in your messages, it hooks her in and makes her feel prompted to respond. This is also a useful hack for writing your own Tinder bio: You want to write as if you’re just writing to one woman “you”, not generally.
3. Comment on something you can see in her pictures - like a travel destination
The third strategy is to comment on something from her pictures. Often pictures will tell a lot about somebody's life, and this can be a solid messaging strategy for you to use on your first message. It's particularly helpful if she hasn't written a profile. But be careful, though, that you don't then default to boring.
(Read this article on the importance of good online dating photos)
So let's say you notice there's a picture of her and she's clearly on holiday in a destination that you think you might recognise. Instead of going for the boring old, "I see you like travel", choose a phrase that is more playful. You could say:
“If I had to guess, that picture of you on holiday, is taken in Bali? I love Ubud.”
Another alternative is to try and figure out what her personality is like through looking at her pictures:
"I could be wrong here. But I bet you're the kind of person who packs EVERYTHING when they go on holiday".
“You travel A LOT. You must be highly organized?”
She will feel a strong prompt to reply to you guessing about who she is as a person. She's gonna want to confirm or deny whether what you've guessed is right or wrong. It also shows some creativity and sets you up to have a playful, teasing banter going back and forth.
It also shows some standards. If she confirms that she is/ isn’t highly organized (for example) you could use this to state something you like in women:
“That’s a relief. I’m a go with the flow person too.”
“Don’t worry I can sit on your suitcase to get the zipper to shut.”
4. Move on!
Controversial opinion: You can choose to not match with women out who have no bio on their profile. Instead of going down the rabbit hole of figuring out what to message someone with only a good photo, think that you need to connect with women who are as invested in the dating process, and as ready to meet people as you are.
Even if her pictures are nice, if her profile has no bio, or if her responses to you are straight-out lazy, then it could be time for you to move along. Choosing to save your time and energy for women who are equally invested in the dating process as you are, the more rewarding dating is going to be.
So if in doubt, rule her out!
(And yes no matter how many matches you’re getting at the moment, you still need to have standards. You can build a better profile to match with more women, but you will always need to filter out women who don’t have the same intentions for dating as you do.
4 Common mistakes guys make when messaging a woman who has no bio on Tinder
1. Don’t be boring
Even if she’s written nothing, a wave or a “hi” from you is unlikely to work. Unless you happen to be Liam Hemsworth. Women get far more matches and interest on dating apps than you do, so whilst you shouldn’t write her a message that’s off puttingly long, you should make some effort. A witty 1 liner is normally about right.
2. Don’t comment on her looks
Women can have a negative association that men on dating apps are just looking for a hookup. It’s also highly likely that during her time on Tinder, Bumble or Hinge she will have received the odd creepy message. Don’t put yourself in that bracket by commenting on her looks, even if your comments are well intended.
3. Avoid cheesy chat up lines
Any message that you could cut and paste to multiple women is going to be disregarded. The most powerful way to get your messages noticed by her on a dating app is to say something she’s never heard before.
4. Don’t send your CV
A perfect messaging exchange on a dating app should look and feel balanced. Don’t kick start the messaging exchange with her, by sending her a long message all about you. She’ll think, “too long, not going to be bothered to read.” Or “how does he have so much time on his hands?!”
Messaging a Woman That Has No Dating App Bio: FAQs
What does a blank Tinder profile mean?
A blank tinder profile means either that they’ve deleted their account (doh) or have unmatched you. Either way, divert your effort elsewhere.
Is no bio better on Tinder?
Whilst it’s easier just to put photos up on your Tinder profile, a well written bio will make your profile more attractive. It’s a balance though: Make sure your bio is short, fun and well written. If words aren’t your thing consider adding a voice note to your profile if you’re using a platform like Hinge or Match.
How much does a bio matter on Tinder?
Whilst dating apps are driven by how someone looks, expressing personality by including a wittily written bio (or in the case of Hinge prompts) is a no brainer. Purely using photos may come across as narcissistic: Add a witty caption and someone can connect more easily with your personality. Remember she’s probably not just looking for the hottest guy to meet on a dating app, she wants to meet a man who would be fun, interesting and all round attractive to go on a date with.
